Dearly Beloved

In the dark, all we could hear was the hiss of the stones.  

Some around us breathed heavily as the heat slowly covered us.  

I lowered my head to the Earth.  

My hand reached for the unknown and he caught it, 

grasping it as his fingers intertwined with mine.

I sang, low to the ground, projecting my voice.  

They listened.  

I placed my hand on him as I sang in the dark and his voice joined mine.  

The prayers swirled and danced with the Ancestors.

I needed to lean, 

I needed to finally let go and feel support.  

He was there next to me, 

heart bleeding and his soul baring all.

Being held in the Womb of the Great Mother's arms,

the Sacred Ancestors singing at our feet,

I was left as though naked and raw

facing the Black Mirror within.

And he held my hand through it all

and my armor melted.

We leaned into each other,

my lips kissing his open palm

and even now...

these words are not enough.

Soul

and

Heart Calling

with a

Fire

blazing

in the background.

....

The Voices started their whispering after we all crawled out.  I didn't know what to say or how to act.  Pretend like it didn't happen? Re-remember who we were from the time before?  Ceremony has this way of peeling off the layers and removing any defensive armor we've brought with us.

I felt confusion and slight guilt for what occurred.  I felt as though I betrayed someone dear to me and I also wondered why I couldn't just receive it as a Gift for that's what it truly was.

In all my years I've been on the Red Road, this was my first time something like this transpired.  It never felt wrong at the time it occurred, it was only afterward I allowed the Voices to slither with their whispers.

They began to infiltrate the cracks and seams of whatever defenses were left.  Then, my Onto family stepped in with their Love and Wisdom.

'The Past is Complete.'

I closed the Door then.  To those Fears and Old Stories.  To the times I was hurt by men.  To the pain that said I was unlovable.  To the wounds that lied and said I was broken.  I kissed the door and nodded my Good-Bye.

I am Whole today.  I am Grace today.  I am Light today. 

I embody LOVE always.

I felt you, my Dear Beloved, in those sweet gentle hands that held me with such care.

I felt you in the songs and prayers,

in the fires and the wind...

and in every step I take.

~~~~

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