A Welcome Home

I stood in the sun yesterday 

waiting 

to be picked up. 

As I stood there 

standing on the sidewalk, 

listening to the cars whizzing by, 

I noticed monarch butterflies 

flitting about 

and I smiled. 

They come 

every year 

around this time 

to do 

what butterflies 

do best: 

gather in 

the plethora 

of Eucalyptus trees 

off Vista Del Mar 

near San Jon Rd 

and carry out 

love notes 

from the fairies 

(well, that's what I think). 

The sunlight 

warmed my skin 

and 

I closed my eyes 

relishing this feeling. 

I reflected on my travels, 

the changes in my body, 

what my eyes took in 

and most importantly...

what my heart shares...

how much love I feel 

and how much it reflects back 

in every one I encounter...

every story I hear...

whispers of encouragement are heard 

and that's when I am not only 

humbled 

but grateful. 

I'm 'Home' 

but truly...

the idea of 'Home' 

when I first left 

was an illusion. 

Home became 

Scotland, England, France, Portugal… 

places I had visited and yet 

when declaring California as a place where I was born 

to people upon first meeting them, 

the concept of 'Home' became a question mark. 

? 

One I didn't have the answer to.  

What to do 

but 

Surrender...

My stomach 

rumbled 

at that moment, 

causing me 

to smile again 

and I was 

taken back 

to the many times 

where I would 

crave 

food from 'Home': 

Cham's and the Kang Ka Ree dish with yellow curry, potatoes and pineapples, 

Corrales and its veggie burrito and yummy salsa, 

Red Brick Pizza and it's gluten free, vegan pizza dough with Daiya cheese and veggies, 

Mary's Secret Garden and everything on it's damn menu but especially my usual, Cilantro Salad and cheesy tortillas,
Sushi Marina and it's avocado and ocean rolls. 

These moments 

of recollection 

came when 

I was tired, 

frustrated 

or just a little homesick 

and reminders of 'Home' 

helped to alleviate 

the pangs of loneliness 

I felt 

at times 

on this journey…

And that's when it dawned on me…

The feeling of coming 'Home', 

the certainty that I could finally 

satiate 

my cravings 

and it was… 

bittersweet.  

I relished 

in anticipation 

for each dish 

I had salivated over 

and another part of me 

realized that 

I could never be 

satiated. 

Thoughts of crepes 

and the french conversations in France, 

oat cakes, instant coffee with gluten free buns and late night sharings in the UK, 

pastel de nata and the laughter whilst walking the streets of Lisbon...

all came to mind.  

Food became 

another way 

of associating 

different travel destinations 

and sensations.  

Memories captured forever 

in bite sized, 

flavorful, 

mouth watering 

moments 

of delight.

For a moment 

I was filled 

with a hint 

of melancholy…

then another butterfly appeared 

and I was reminded of the Present.

I was like that butterfly, 

I flitted about 

traveling to different destinations…

sending and receiving love notes 

of my own…

And I was welcomed Home again. 

Embraced and engulfed 

by all that had passed 

and what has yet to manifest.

Home was this Moment. 

Home was Love and Acceptance. 

Home was Right Here…

flitting on the small wings of the butterfly, 

my skin kissed by the Sun…

on the ends of my fingertips…

and in my Heart 

where 

Love knows no bounds…